Friday, August 18, 2006
Self-Questions to be asked Before Making Friendship
If you do decide it's time to take your friendship a step further, then here are some things to think about. It may save you a great deal of time and effort: -
Ask yourself these questions::
* Do you feel you know the person well?
* Have they answered all your question?
* Are they patient, good humored and fun?
* Do you trust them?
* Have they applied any pressure on you?
* Do you know what they do for a living, and the area they live in?
* Do you know about their background and family?
* Have you seen their photo and have you more than one photo of them in different situations?
* Have you spoken on the phone?
* Are you sure they have described themselves truthfully?
If you can answer YES to these happily then maybe it is time to meet. Only you can decide that. Think about these general dating rules, and act upon them if you think they are a good idea :-
Tell a person close to you about the meeting. Tell them where you are going, when you are meeting them, where the meeting will take place, what time you will be returning. Give a person close to you as much information as you can. If you have a mobile phone or are close to a pay phone then perhaps call to say you are fine and that everything is great.
Agree to meet in a public place first. Perhaps a restaurant or bar or somewhere where there are plenty of other people. Agree to meet somewhere that you know, in familiar surroundings where you can relax and enjoy the meeting. You could arrange to have other friends in the same place but at a distance, so you feel more relaxed.
Do not agree to be collected from work or home, and make your own way there and home on the first occasion. Perhaps get a friend to take you there and collect you afterwards.
Restrict the time of the first meeting. Perhaps a lunch hour or a short time after work. This is useful if you decide that the situation is not favorable and you need to leave.
If at any point you wish to leave then do so. Do not feel obliged to stay and find yourself feeling awkward. If you do not feel relaxed then you will not enjoy the date. You owe it to yourself to feel happy and relaxed, and it is possible that it may take a few meetings with different people before you find that special person.
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Nine Tips to First Date
Online Dating through many sites helps you to easily meet people from all over the world. This is a fantastic way of dating and perhaps very soon you may find yourself emotionally involved with someone who lives a long way away. Perhaps that may be part of the attraction even. However you should try and be practical.Here are some tips for First Date ::
* Ask friendly questions. Having a hard time making conversation? Before you go on the date, first review the other person's profile and then think of a few questions to ask. These will help you get to know the other person better. "Ask, don't babble."
* What to Wear? So you've read GQ or Cosmo, still having a hard time figuring out what "look" you should have? Ladies, definitely dress conservative for the first date - you want him talking to you, not ogling your goodies. And guys, clean and simple does it - no fancy threads are needed for the first date. No tshirts, no silk - a polo shirt works great.
* Be Upbeat. Be upbeat, smile, give the other person reassurance that you're fun to be around. And sincere. Many people complain or talk about their past. Be in the present - be pleasant. Be yourself - don't try to be what you think they want.
* Late to the party? Being late shows disrespect and is a sure turn off. Make a good first impression by being on time. Give yourself an extra 15 minutes lead time.
* Don't wear any cologne or perfume. Nowadays, these are a turnoff to most. Deodarant alone is fine. Try it.
* Confidence is Sexy. How do You show confidence? Make sure to keep eye contact and a pleasant, relaxed conversation. Being sure of yourself is attractive - and your date will notice it!
* Avoid Current Events. Avoid politics, religion, and world events like war. Your goal is to learn about the other person's values. Bringing up potential topics of disagreement is a sure way to not get a second date. Stay in neutral territory at first
* Read their Body Language and React. Are they studying the tabletop more than you, twenty minutes into the date? Or, are they leaning forward, making more eye contact? Learn to judge when you're "blowing it" versus when you're making a good impression. React to the signals that are being sent to you.
* Parting Shots. Ok the date's over, the check's been paid. If you want to see them again, tell them so, in a casual way - "I had a good time, thanks - hey let me know if you want to get together again." This opens up the possibility of a next date, without asking for a commitment or getting an awkward silence.
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