Saturday, August 12, 2006


Tips for Safe and Sound Online Dating

Here are some tips following which may help you in safe and sound online dating.

Start slow:: While dating over the net, watch out for someone who seems too good to be true. Begin by first communicating solely via email. Be on the lookout for odd behavior or inconsistencies. "Listen" to your correspondent's words. The person at the other end may not be who or what he/she says. Trust your instincts. If anything makes you uncomfortable, walk away for your own safety and protection.

Guard your anonymity:: Never include your last name, real email address, personal Web site URL, home address, phone number, place of work, or any other identifying information in your profile or initial emails you exchange with other members. Make sure your email signature file is turned off, or does not include identifying information, when corresponding with a member via your own email.

Stop communicating with anyone who pressures you for this information or attempts in any way to trick you into revealing it. Take all the time you need to become comfortable with someone before revealing any personal contact information. Ask questions and make sure you are satisfied with the answers. Trust your instincts, move cautiously and be selective.

Exercise caution and common sense:: Careful, well-thought decisions generally lead to better results in dating, and this is certainly true with online dating too. Guard against trusting the untrustworthy. Any suitor must earn your trust gradually, through consistently honorable, forthright behavior. Your job is to take all the time you need to test for a trustworthy person, and pay careful attention along the way.

Take a relatively conservative approach to trusting anyone you meet online. If you think someone is lying, it is likely that they are, so act accordingly. Move on to someone you can eventually trust. Conduct yourself and your romances in a responsible manner. Don't fall in love at the click of a mouse. Don't become prematurely intimate with someone, even if that intimacy only occurs online.

Request a photo. A photo will give you a good idea of the person's appearance, which may prove helpful in achieving a gut feeling about your correspondent. In fact, it's best to view several images of this person in a variety of settings: casual, formal, indoor, outdoors. If he or she continuously comes up with an excuse, it may be because that person has something to hide. Getting a photo scanned is not expensive, so there is little excuse for not doing it.

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Find Someone Special

Browsing through the personal classifieds can be quite frustrating if you really don’t know what qualities or the type of personality it is that you are searching for in the person you are seeking, or in the relationship you are seeking.

Questions you need to ask yourself before and as you are reading through the personal sections again are:

Why are you searching for someone, do you want a companion, a serious relationship or just to make friends with someone new with the hopes of dating?
Who are you looking for, are you searching for someone tall, short, thin, stout, young, old, divorced, widowed, single, married, and the list goes on to include all personal choices and preferences in people. ?

Top ideas to use in your opening introduction letter are express your interest to your potential "Date" using your writing to express why you are contacting that person. Reveal to this person how you propose to meet their needs in their search for a friend, companion or lover using expressive words such as "I intend to" or "I would like to" or even "I have been searching through the classifieds and found your profile appealing to me because". Give just a few hints about your where you are located, without revealing to much about your without determining whether the two of you will continue a conversation.

Use phrases like, "I am from the east coast" or "I live south of California" or other such general terms, revealing your location to a particular location through later conversations.

Your initial contact with a proposed "Date" should be about the type of person you are searching for, why you have been using resources online to search for someone special, and what you are hoping to gain from a relationship from this person with personal details revealed through additional conversations as your ‘relationship’ trust grows.

Online personals have been created for the user to act anonymously while investigating the possibilities of friendship, love and for finding that someone special to spend your life with.

Using your thoughts and feelings through this situation, creatively with expressive words without misleading readers will allow you to reach your destination, of finding that someone special, faster and easier that you would be able to in any other situation.

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